Thursday, April 06, 2006

I won't let go of this.

Tom Cruise bought Katie Holmes an "adult-sized binky" to help take her mind off the intense pain of having her perineum ripped apart by a gynormous Scientologist baby head.


Did ya'll see this picture?

That baby's gonna weigh 13 lb and be all head. It's going to have the pointiest baby cone head the world has ever seen from being so enormous and then being squeezed out the vaginal canal. Katie hurts me just thinking about it. Let me go out on a limb here and say that I don't know if a Binky's gonna do the trick. IT'S NOT TOO LATE FOR THE HAPPY DRUGS.

He also bought her an iPod to listen to as she delivers. What a stand-up guy!


Colleen said...

One word...insane.

Kim said...

Don't worry. I'm obsessed with the idiocy of Tom Cruise as well. Give a whirl - you'll be AMAZED. And also horrified.

It's surprising that a professionally trained psychiatrist doesn't know that uh, childbirth hurts. Maybe he was absent from medical school the day they learned that.