Wednesday, February 22, 2006

New York, New York it's a hell of a town!

Leaving tomorrow for NYC!! Seeing Laura and Nikki, cause for joyous celebration!!! (Course, any occasion to leave Iowa is a cause to break out the Hypnotiq.) But I'll work on my papers and abstracts on the plane, I promise. Last time Gaya and I went to NYC to see Laura we were so confused leaving JFK because her email said something about "e village" and we were like What is this e village? and How do we find this e village? until we realized that it meant EAST village. I have never felt more like an Iowan in my whole entire life. (Except when we were getting ready to LEAVE and I realized that I had accidentally scheduled the departure flight out of NEWARK.) I just got an email from Laura saying that if I can't handle this whole "e village" thing just say "Sty town" and try not to confuse the cab driver this time.

Reflux can't handle the cold weather that well so upon the advice of my mother I've been letting him pee in the bathtub, and then just taking him out once a day for poopy time. (Oh STOP IT, urine is sterile and you're more likely to get chlamydia from a toilet seat than some weird infection from stepping in dog pee.)

It works like magic! I fill a Tupperware with some warm water, dunk his paw in there and .... Voila! Pee-pee time! If you run water while he's in there and it pools around his feet, then lift him up right away, he does this confused doggy paddle in mid-air. I think it's because he doesn't understand what's happening to him. Why am I floating? Oh I must be in water. Time to swim. Because of the blindness. And deafness. And general confusedness of dementia. The only thing is, it's the saddest little doggy paddle I've ever seen. Like, if he were ever actually in a body of water, he would just drown. Quickly.


punchberry said...

You are an unusually devoted pet owner. Is Reflux going to NYC too?

square peg said...

No, I had to sedate him and drag him to the boarding place this morning.

And I'm so flattered! Although if it were up to me I'd pay someone 8 billion dollars if they could toilet train him without him falling into the toilet.