Monday, October 17, 2005

"Don't want no short people 'round here"

The other day Yolanda and I had a 30 minute discussion about "petite" sizing while looking at dresses on jcrew and BR online. We wondered, is it for women who are actually short, or does it mean for small women -- like, small all over. A little person. (Except not, y'know, THAT kind of little person. A little person of standard genotype.)

Why do the short ladies get the privileges? I understand making PANTS come in short and tall sizes, because, y'know, they go on your legs, but why is there a whole section of every store devoted to short women? Why don't all manners of disproportion get a store section? Like, unusually large or unusually small chests? Short waisted? Big shoulders? Big hips? Small booties?

I have to get all my pants altered because even the "tall" sizes are too damn short. (I'm looking at you, Benetton.) Why do short ladies get all this special attention? I mean (here I go on a windy rant about nothing, feel free to tune out) think about it: you can always tailor pants and get them hemmed, but it's not like you can ADD MATERIAL to pants to make them longer. I hate when I hear women in stores gripe about how "these pants are just too long!" Now you feel my pain, sister: going into any store and knowing you'll have to pay $10 extra on top of what the stupid pants already cost because you need them lengthened as tall as they go. (Except for Gap: Good ol' Gap comes in short, regular, long, and EXTRA-LONG. I loves the extra-long. Unfortunately, it is the Gap.)

(World's tiniest violin starts playing.)

I know, I know. If this is the only thing eating my liver then life probably ain't too bad.

Anyway, this quest for information culminated at Talbott's, where I went today to do research on the Petites section. I made an important discovery: I cannot afford any clothing from Talbott's. That shit is expensive!

Anyway, I wandered into Sally Beauty Supply hoping their OPI would be on sale, and I discovered an interesting hair product:

(Good use of the 'n'. Gives it a folksy feeling of down-home goodness. Like pork 'n' beans.)

I was curious as to why such a graphic description of the contents was necessary. In all seriousness, I guess the protein in placenta would strenghten the hair.

I was curious as to whose placenta I would actually be smearing on my hair. The back of the packet says the placenta extracts come from animals' placenta, immediately followed by a no animal testing disclaimer. I still don't know what placenta it is, but I pity the poor med/vet student who had to 'deliver' it. It's probably just egg yolk, anyway.

Before I left the mall I stopped at Waldenbooks 'n' got these 2 books:

(The latter is supposed to be one of the two books every good Chicagoan is supposed to read; the other being The Time Traveler's Wife.)
Speaking of Chicago, received a funny class e-mail from one of the classmates (sometimes I miss those guys) today:
Amid the flood of emails regarding sublets and board books, tests and long call nights, it is easy to forget that we attend medical school in one of the greatest cities in the world. It is a city of arts and culture, of big ideas and bigger personalities, of parks, and a beautiful lakefront. It is a cosmopolitan city, a world class city, and now, dare we say, a Championship City thanks to…

The American League Champion CHICAGO WHITE SOX.

That’s right. Last night in stunning fashion the White Sox won the pennant with a dominating 4-1 ALCS victory over the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim.

Four more victories for a, dare we even dream it, a World Series Championship.

See you all on Saturday night for Game 1 of the 2005 World Series.

Bring on the NL.
GO SOX!!!!
I miss you Chicago. :-(
I've got the hotline phone tonight for RVAP so I can't go to yoga class. And yoga class yesterday was cancelled. (*sniffle) Gotta sit at home with the Ben and Jerry's.


Serena said...

Oh I'm sorry about the your pants crises... I'm one of the short girls so I'll never know what its like to have long legs. By the way... How is the placenta stuff for your hair? Isn't funny what we do for beauty? =)

square peg said...

H, Thanks for your sympathy...I'll think I'll make it out of the pants crisis with lots of bitching but hopefully no major scars.

Yah, I tried the placenta, my hair looked exactly the same afterwards.

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